For the most part, I'm intending for this blog to be witty, informative, and insightful on a variety of subjects, most political, all practical in some fashion. However. . .
Every once in a while, I need to stick my foot into pure, childlike silliness.
This is such a time:
Oh, the geek is strong with this one. I loved this drink as a kid, and I can't wait to try the recipe.
If you have, please comment! I'm curious.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
The Media Finally Gets One Right
If you're raising your eyebrows at me, don't worry. I'm not a Dancing With The Stars fan, or a fan of Cher, or anything else. But did you notice the consistent use of "he" throughout the article? Yeah, if you're the average straight person, chances are you didn't.
If you're alternatively gendered/sexed, I'll bet you caught it.
Source: Yahoo!
News about Thomas Beatie, a man who became pregnant, first hit the shelves in 2008. I remember listening to my co-workers at the time; many of them were insulted that the media referred to Mr. Beatie as a man, stating that "so long as he has woman parts, he's a woman."
In feminist theory there is an acknowledgement that to be is to be perceived. I could climb to the top of the Empire State building, proclaim myself Spiderman, but that no more makes me Spiderman than calling an apple an orange makes the apple taste like an orange.
To identify as something requires a bit of a push-pull with others. How do you know you are a woman or a man? Because you have the attributes of what you AND other people consider to be "womanly" or "manly." For those who chose (and in some cases even when they don't choose) to take the label of man or woman but fail to meet social expectations, the consequences can be deadly.
Source: ChristopherBoe
But to identify as something is also a basic human right. To be able to claim that "I am" is fundamental to Western cultures. And yet, when confronted with a female-born man, culture consistently denies these humans that basic right of self-identification: I cannot be me, unless you also agree that I am me.
Here are my guidelines. I'm sure there are those who feel differently:
If you are referring to a crossdresser or drag queen - when referring to the person who is in character, use the pronoun of the character. If Ru Paul is in drag, then she is fabulous. When Ru Paul is out of drag, he's still a great actor.
When referring to a transgendered person - Once the person is confident enough to say "I am", then respect the gender the person is transitioning to. In Chaz Bono's case, once he decided to become a man, all future references should change to the male pronoun. To refuse to do so denies those people the right to exist.
How would you like it if suddenly a good portion of the country decided you didn't exist?
For the zhes, s/hes, and others - At the risk of getting overly complicated (really, people, there is a reason why LGBTQRXYZ is jokingly called "alphabet soup" in the gay community), we really should try to be respectful of people's self-labelling. But alternatively gendered folks should be patient too. We've barely just gotten far enough that news media is finally calling a transgendered man a he! Give it some time before you start throwing third genders and genderqueer issues at them.
My one critique of the Yahoo! article is that they never mention why Chaz's beard would be important to him or why he's particularly famous. To someone who isn't familiar with the backstory, the article would seem confusing. While they did well in using the male pronoun throughout, they slipped a bit in failing to address the issue in a clear, direct manner.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Disability As A Game
*facepalm* Mom stops kids' play because it's "disabelist" [sic]
Source: Chairsstairlift.com
The woman has great intentions, don't get me wrong. She wants to ensure that her kids are raised with an awareness and appreciation of difference. This is a noble goal. My concern is with the execution.
Instead of telling kids that pretending to be paralyzed is bad, morph the game into a learning tool. Build, borrow, or work something into a wheelchair, and then have the kids attempt to maneuver themselves with it. How will they get up stairs, get to the bathroom, get into bed, swim, without using their legs? Can they play basketball, hide and seek, or baseball in the wheelchair? What is easier? What is more difficult? Go out in public. How do the children feel when they are approached by strangers? Do they get stared at, ignored, laughed at?
Similar situation with missing arms / legs / fingers / eyes. By encouraging the kids to dig a little deeper in their play, Mom can help her kids not just sympathize with disabled people, but actually empathize. Encourage the kids to have conversations with disabled people - you might even learn a thing or two yourself.
Disability opens a person up to being a "public" body, meaning that everyone thinks they have the right to comment on your situation, because "visible" to most folks equals "not private." I often have people come up to me, asking if they can talk about something "personal", and then reveal to me the latest and greatest medical treatment for my condition, as if I haven't already tried it. People, whether or differing ability, race or religion, simply want to be acknowledged as human. There is more to me than my forehead, there is more to a paralyzed person than their wheelchair, and there is more to a black person than the color of skin.
Unfortunately, by making her childrens' play appear to be a shameful thing, this mother may have handicapped her kids' ability to empathize with others by using their imagination to pretend what it would be like to be disabled. Our childrens' greatest asset is their imagination; shame on anyone who attempts to stick that in a wheelchair.
Source: Chairsstairlift.com
Instead of telling kids that pretending to be paralyzed is bad, morph the game into a learning tool. Build, borrow, or work something into a wheelchair, and then have the kids attempt to maneuver themselves with it. How will they get up stairs, get to the bathroom, get into bed, swim, without using their legs? Can they play basketball, hide and seek, or baseball in the wheelchair? What is easier? What is more difficult? Go out in public. How do the children feel when they are approached by strangers? Do they get stared at, ignored, laughed at?
Similar situation with missing arms / legs / fingers / eyes. By encouraging the kids to dig a little deeper in their play, Mom can help her kids not just sympathize with disabled people, but actually empathize. Encourage the kids to have conversations with disabled people - you might even learn a thing or two yourself.
Disability opens a person up to being a "public" body, meaning that everyone thinks they have the right to comment on your situation, because "visible" to most folks equals "not private." I often have people come up to me, asking if they can talk about something "personal", and then reveal to me the latest and greatest medical treatment for my condition, as if I haven't already tried it. People, whether or differing ability, race or religion, simply want to be acknowledged as human. There is more to me than my forehead, there is more to a paralyzed person than their wheelchair, and there is more to a black person than the color of skin.
Unfortunately, by making her childrens' play appear to be a shameful thing, this mother may have handicapped her kids' ability to empathize with others by using their imagination to pretend what it would be like to be disabled. Our childrens' greatest asset is their imagination; shame on anyone who attempts to stick that in a wheelchair.
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